Fights are common between siblings. I have a brother who is five years younger than me. We fight about everything: food, chores, seats, you name it. However, after spending more than ten years together, I have learned some useful strategies that help us get along.

Wait for siblings to calm down before communicating with them

Siblings often need to compromise. When you can’t find a compromise, arguments arise. Usually during a fight it’s hard to behave rationally, so the best choice is to let both yourself and your sibling calm down before fixing the problem.

For example, in my house, my brother and I are in charge of cleaning up the bathrooms and living room. However, my brother hated cleaning the bathroom and one time he got visibly angry about it.

Instead of arguing with him, however, I waited for him to calm down before trying to reason with him. After he calmed down, we quickly agreed to take turns cleaning the bathrooms.

In the end, we solved the problem without wasting time and energy by arguing.

Set boundaries with your siblings

Boundaries are important. When you set boundaries with siblings, you can maintain healthy relationships without letting your siblings unintentionally offend you.

For example, when my brother was three years old, he always took my belongings without permission. At first, he only took small things like pens and candies, so I ignored it. However, as he grew older, his petty theft just got worse.

To address the problem, I set boundaries by warning him that he couldn’t take my stuff without permission. Slowly, he got used to not having my stuff, and our relationship got better.

Avoid tattling on your siblings if you don’t absolutely have to

Tattling about little things is the dumbest way to destroy a relationship since it only creates distrust and arguments.

When I was younger, my brother and I always tattled on each other, and our relationship was terrible. Our relationship improved when we decided not to tattle on each other.

Once, my brother accidentally broke a plate in the kitchen. Instead of tattling on him, I chose to fix the situation with him. We cleaned the mess up and my brother didn’t get scolded, and we also fixed the distrust and estrangement caused by tattling.

In short, don’t tattle on your siblings since it doesn’t do you any good and only destroys trust and relationships.

Use actions to show that you care about your siblings

Actions speak louder than words when it comes to showing love for siblings. When your siblings feel love through your actions, they treat you well in return, which creates a positive cycle that strengthens relationships.

One way I show I care about my brother is by paying attention to things he is interested in. For example, my brother is obsessed with Pokémon, so sometimes I buy him Pokémon cards to surprise him. These cards are cheap, but they are a way I can show I appreciate him, which strengthens our bond.

Don’t underestimate the importance of showing you care about your siblings as it can build, maintain, and deepen your bond with them.

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Getting along with younger siblings is a challenge that takes a lot of patience and love, since sometimes, siblings are just annoying. However, building strong and healthy relationships with your siblings is important because siblings can be your best friends that love and support you no matter what challenges you face. We might not realize this early on, but our siblings will be some of the most important people in our lives.