Every parent considers their kid the most important thing in the world, and parents try their best to ensure kids are living carefree and safely. However, some parents become overly involved in their kids’ lives. These overprotective parents shield kids from danger, make decisions for kids, and sort out all kids’ problems. Although every parent wants to care for their kids as well as they can, sometimes they need to loosen their grip to help them mature.

Here are three reasons why overprotective parenting hinders kids from growing:

When parents are overprotective, kids become intimidated by setbacks

Overprotected kids are afraid of taking risks and experiencing difficulties because their parents help and protect them too much. These kids become prone to anxiety and depression when they encounter setbacks such as bad grades and problems in their social lives. Since overprotected kids have their parents to solve all their problems, these kids lack coping skills and are afraid of failure.

Kids lack independence and decision-making skills

Overprotective parents take too many responsibilities for their kids. Thus, overprotected kids have a hard time completing basic tasks such as doing chores. Also, some overprotective parents set their children’s entire schedules or even choose their majors for college, so these kids become used to being told what to do and thus become overly dependent on their parents.

The problem with overdependence is when they become adults, overprotected kids cannot think independently and have a hard time making decisions. Then, even as adults, they too often follow their parents’ opinions and plans, even if this is not what is best for them.

For instance, some traditional Taiwanese parents want their kids to become doctors. Even if their kids want to study something else, these parents still force them to study medical science. Some kids might not be interested in being doctors, but they just go along with what their parents tell them to do.

Kids want to avoid overprotective parents

Some overprotected kids may want to avoid their parents because parents have imposed too many restrictions. Most kids seek more autonomy when they reach their teenage years. However, if parents micromanage them, kids can become manipulative or rebellious in an attempt to prove to their parents they are in charge of themselves. In the long term, overprotective parenting strains the relationship between parents and kids.

Because overprotective parenting hinders development, parents should try these strategies instead:

Have open conversations with kids

Parents need to talk with their kids often. Overprotective parents may not know exactly what their kids need and thus worry too much about them. A better strategy is for parents to listen to their kids’ wishes and wants, even though they might be different from the parents’. When both sides understand each other’s concerns, they can talk about their worries and possible next steps.

Allow kids to explore new things

Parents should allow kids to try new things. Some parents worry about kids getting hurt or struggling. However, parents should encourage kids to explore and celebrate their efforts and progress. When parents are supportive of kids, kids become motivated to aim higher.

For example, I have been passionate about biking since I was six. Although I risked falling down and getting hurt when I first rode my bike, my parents always encouraged me to keep practicing. After I became comfortable with riding my bike in a park, I became motivated to ride on the road and into the mountains. Now, I am an avid biker.

Let kids experience failure

Parents should let their kids attempt to solve their own problems. Parents can offer advice, but not immediately. As kids confront more difficulties, they learn from them and thus become more resilient and thoughtful.

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Overprotective parenting curtails kids’ growth. It makes kids fearful of failure and overly reliant on their parents. In some cases, overprotective parenting pushes kids away from parents. If parents refrain from hovering over their kids all the time, kids will become more independent. Clearly, overprotective parenting is detrimental to kids, so parents should let their kids explore and mature.